Tiny little breaths

Tiny little breaths
In
Out
In
Out

Tiny little fingers
Curled around my Tshirt
I look at you
Asleep in my arms
And I wonder
What are you thinking little child

Sometimes you look at me so intently
Making little baby noises
Like I should know what you’re saying
You’re being very clear
But I don’t know

You want to be in my arms
And it’s lovely
But it’s tiring
My back is aching
And I don’t know what’s wrong

You smell so sweet
Baby smell
It’s innocent
Milky breath
Snuggling into my arm
I want to protect you from the world
I want to hold you in my arms

Leave her
They say
Come back to work
She’ll be fine
But she is my little girl
The screams when I leave
Make me ache a bit
Because I don’t know if they’ll hold her like I would

And it is so odd
Because this wasn’t me
When you’re depressed
With a baby
You don’t care
But I have begun caring

Now when they want me to let go
Now when this little person is starting to move away
Now I want to hold on

Sleep in my arms baby
Be safe there
I don’t care what they say